The Mommy Hierarchy - A Mother's Day Homily

I have a 7 year-old daughter named Firefly. She was born on January 27, 2006. 

I did not give birth to her, she was formed, and grew in the womb of my partner, Beth. I’ve wondered how it might feel to have a tiny human being living inside of me, but I’ve never felt deprived of an experience that some insist is essential to motherhood. 


It seems though that there is an unspoken Mommy Hierarchy – an unfortunate construct that inevitably places biological parents at the top. 

But I’m going to tell you a secret – 
I loved Firefly into being. I loved her so much before she even existed that a space opened up in the world just for her. I’m not denying the importance of the sperm and egg, or the uterus. I just want you to understand that Firefly was the daughter I loved, the daughter already in my heart, the daughter I knew I would hold in my arms, before I ever met her. Even though she wasn’t growing inside me, we were already one.

After the last supper, and before his arrest, Jesus gathered his disciples and prayed for them, saying,

I ask not only on behalf of these, but also on behalf of those who will believe in me through their word, that they may all be one. As you, Father, are in me and I am in you, may they also be in us. 

As you’ve no doubt noticed, the Gospel of St. John is full of otherworldly talk. I’m not going to pretend to know what it means to be one with the Father. My limited understanding of this oneness has been mystical in nature. All week long I’ve been trying to figure out what the union between God and Jesus and among us looks like here on earth; what we must do to achieve the union; and what we are to do once we are in union with God and Jesus?

Historically, documents intended to create unity, like the Nicene Creed, have created division. And that’s putting it lightly. Let’s be honest, though we’re all members of this church, we don’t believe the same things, some of us may not even believe in God. These extreme variations are one reason this place is so moving, and unforgettable.

Because May 8^th was the feast day of Dame Julian of Norwich, I turned to her writings for some insight on unity. Julian puts it simply – 

Prayer unites the soul to God. And so he teaches us to pray and to have firm trust that we shall have it; for he beholds us in love, and wants to make us partners in his good will and work.

Prayer is what unifies us. And that’s just what Jesus did with his disciples before the authorities carted him away – he prayed with them, and for them, and for us, his followers who were yet to be. Prayer was Jesus last display of devotion.

Prayer transcends differences. So this scrappy group that St. John’s is - rich and poor, street smart and book smart, democrat and republican, united in the love of God in Christ--can pray as one. The catch is, being one with the Father, experiencing a divine sense of unity, is not actually the goal.  It is the means by which we achieve the goal. And that goal is the New Commandment that Jesus gave his disciples after he washed their feet and before he prayed for them:

That you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you should also love one another.

How we treat others – neighbors we see daily, strangers we stand next to on the BART, families with whom we live – how we love one another is the yardstick by which our love for Jesus is measured. Jesus commands us to love so deeply that the wellbeing of others, seen and unseen, is considered in our every action. Sometimes that means having the courage to speak hard truths.  Sometimes it means working the phone banks to abolish the death penalty. Sometimes it means putting aside what we were doing to simply be present to another.

Recall the words of Dame Julian:

God beholds us in love, and wants to make us partners in his good will and work.

In other words, God is inviting us to co-create with him the realm of heaven on earth; following Jesus’ New Commandment is the only way that work will be accomplished.

Just as God loved Jesus before the foundation of the world, God held us in his arms before we were born. We are on this earth to love the kingdom of God into being.  


We are on this earth to love the kingdom of God into being.

 When that kingdom comes, there will be no hunger, or thirst for clean water, and there will be no mommy hierarchy. The kinship of Christ will always trump blood kinship.

Dame Julian wrote,

The mother can give her child to suck of her milk,

but our precious Mother Jesus can feed us with himself,

and does most courteously and most tenderly,
             with the blessed sacrament which is the food of true life.

Amen.

7 Easter YC